I have been inspired to write this because I’m concerned about what my son (if I’ll have one) will think of women. My dad taught me how to be real man and I shall do the same to save my son from becoming a douche. . We are living in a society where the majority has misconceptions and wrong priorities. I’m afraid that unlike me, my son will view women as sexual tools only and nothing else.
With the increasing number of women who are willing to post naked pictures in the internet and seek cheap fame through their bodily curves, I’m afraid that my son will only see women in a way what these ratchets portray themselves – sexual figures.
Kenya is becoming a ‘socialites’ den. The definition of socialite has been twisted but these ladies are running away with the word while singing, “Catch us if you can.” Every day, these symbols of sexuality are increasing in numbers. Huddah, Vera, Risper, Corazon, Horizon etc… Ooh is there one called Horizon too? I’ve lost count.
You know the feeling you get when someone insists on showing you their car yet you have a much better car than they do? That’s the feeling I get when I see socialites. I don’t understand why a specific group of people decide to show us their inflated body parts yet some of us have wives or girlfriends with far more attractive bodily features.
I’m still afraid that my son will see women as breasts and bum only. I’m afraid that my son will be like a medieval African King who sees females as nothing but property. With the amount of publicity that nudity is getting, things will only get worse. Sexual prowess is being given priority over intellect. We are destroying all the pinnacles that great men and women in history fought for.
I don’t want my son to see women as just ‘tap mates.‘ I want my son to see women as the special beings that God created them to be. Here is what I’ll tell my son
Appreciate a woman but don’t tolerate her misdemeanors
Every woman loves to be appreciated. It doesn’t matter whether she deserves the appreciation or not. If she makes an effort, it’s your duty to appreciate. When she cooks that awful dinner for you after really trying her best to make it come out right, she needs to hear and know that you appreciate it. Women love to hear you say this food is good” and “you look good”.
However, In as much as a woman loves to be appreciated, she wouldn’t respect a man who kisses her ass. If she gives you bullshit, give her bullshit too. She’ll realize where she went wrong. Remember that it’s not a woman’s job to take care of you all day long or to do domestic chores all year round, Don’t let her overwork. Equal contribution and participation is essential for a long lasting relationship.
Don’t compare, simply understand
Don’t compare a woman with your mother or your first love. Women vary in everything and that is why it shouldn’t be expected that all women carry the same qualities. Sometimes women are complex so don’t always try to immerse yourself into their merry-go-round. You might shame yourself like one Colonel Mustapha.
Different women have different characteristics and it’s in your power to understand them and make a choice. Don’t spend your days trying to change a woman. As you waste time doing that, your peers will be doing greater things and getting ahead of you. If a lady wants to change for you, she will, even without you asking for it. Comparing the present woman with the past one is simply unreasonable too. Generations change but morals and intellect should remain. That should be your basis for drawing a conclusion.
Respect a woman but judge her too
Respect a woman and engage her in various aspects of life, not just sexually. Be a gentleman but don’t forget to judge. Have the ability to differentiate a respectable woman from a lost woman. A woman who drops her pants freely is worth your general respect but not worth your commitment or time. A woman who clears bitter liquor in minutes doesn’t mind showing of all her body parts to the world might seem desirable, but remember that, ‘The greatest of pleasures come with the greatest of pains.’ It’s better to enjoy good things in moderation than all at once. .
Do not try too hard
Women tend to have their preferences. If she is different from any other woman you have been with before, it is simply because that is how her persona is. If she doesn’t like you, don’t force it. Cliches state that there’s plenty of sea in the fish in the sea and that’s very true. You have two options, either try to comprehend what makes her click or don’t bother trying to enter her life.
Do not go crazy and do things that insane men do. Never force yourself on a woman and never force a woman on yourself. If you conduct yourself as an insightful and action oriented man, you will always get the best women. So be a man.
I believe you will be wise enough to figure it out anything else yourself.
N.B. I have re-blogged this post by Philip Etemesi from the Niaje blog after it caught my eye and i claim no ownership of the content.